Keep in mind I’ve lived in WV for a decade now. &0183;&32;An old plastic chair (that we still use during outdoor parties) and an old tire that was outside - do you see why we may be a little redneck - was added to round it all off. If you've ever had to haul a can of paint to defend your sister's honor.
You Might Be a Redneck If. Petersburg and say, "Yo'all get into the truck, we goin' up to the big house. 1. If you are kin with everyone in your coven. &0183;&32;if you call yourself pro-life but support the death penalty, supported Bush's wars, want the ACA repealed even protections for pre-existing conditions and don't wear a mask in public.
Here's a funny redneck joke: "If you've been on television more than 5 times describing _____, you might be a redneck. If you buy your ritual wine at the same store where you buy your bait. You might be a redneck if you are in love with every girl in your class and you are home schooled. It's easier said than done. .
Finish the sentence. If your wand is the part you sawed off your shotgun. More than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general. mickey moussaoui Aug at 8:40 am I resemble that remark. You might be a redneck if your father walks you to school because you're both in the same grade! The date and time are required if the meet-up has a definite plan. In tough situations you ask yourself, What would Curly do. &0183;&32;You Might Be a Redneck IF.
You Know You're in a Redneck Church if. " Now a case out of Georgia cautions us that if an employee complains. 11413 You might be a redneck if. You think Sherlock Holmes is a housing project down in Biloxi. You've ever used duct tape to pack you car.
You might be a redneck if your mother does not remove the Marlboro from her lips before telling the state patrolman to kiss her ass. &0183;&32;You might be a redneck if If this is your first visit, you will need to register before you are able to join in on a discussion. You might be a redneck. (Part III) You Might Be A Rednick If. &0183;&32;You might be in a redneck church if. You might be a Redneck If. Those of a us of a certain age remember comedian Jeff Foxworthy's routine about "You Might Be A Redneck If. :eek: Keep it light.
Fewer than half of your cars run. Son_of_Niall Novem, 10:28pm 2. If somebody asks to see your ID and you show them your belt buckle. If every day somebody comes to your house mistakenly thinking your having a yard sale.
Your middle schooler who isn’t old enough to drink? Enough about Jeff’s famous margaritas. R38 F69 1989 The Physical Object Pagination 74 p. You own a home that is mobile and 5 cars that aren't. You drink gas because you found out you can run two and a half miles per hour faster.
David Voigt says. " one-liners. " If you've ever financed a tattoo. If you have a 'reserved' cell at the police station. These are here for your amusement and enjoyment. Gems by Jeff Foxworthy!
You May Be A Redneck Pilot If. You think “fast food” is hitting a possum at 65 MPH 3. encapsulates the humor of Jeff Foxworthy on a single disc. You might be a Redneck if you get plastered at your middle schooler’s graduation party? Wall, Redneck, Wife. You might be a redneck if you have a sliding window in the back of your truck so you can throw beer cans in the back as you drive.
In the text please put the kind of meeting, what you do there, the amount of. (Part II) You Might Be A Rednick If. you've used an unused hunting trophy for a door bell. You've ever used lard in bed. They always make fun of the way I talk, I keep telling them I said your gonna be real surprised when you get into the habit in St. There is a stuffed possum anywhere in your house. You Might Be a Redneck If. It was released by Warner Bros.
If your book of shadows has a needlepoint of the rebel flag with all the stars as Pentagrams on the cover. &0183;&32;you might be a redneck if you use the bed of your truck as a deer blind. the shooting that took place next door. Catholic or Protestant. Jennings on 10 January.
54237 You might be a redneck if. &0183;&32;You might be in a redneck church if, when the pastor gives his last sermon to the congregation that fired him, he asks them to remember the symbols of Christmas -- and has mistletoe hanging from the back of his belt. You must have 10,000 "You might be a redneck if.
You might be a redneck if your idea of a perfect first date with a lady is a six-pack and going four-wheeling. None are meant to offend, but some might. (Part IV) You Might Be A Rednick If. 5402 Library of Congress PN6231. AquaFINEa Regular Member.
you get dressed up for shopping at Wal-mart. But you are a hypocrite and not pro-life. And I saw on TV the other day that you were doing redneck fashion critiques. You think a stock tip is advice on wormin’ your hogs.
User account menu • You might be a redneck if. Your front porch collapses and more than six dogs are killed. The album was recorded at. Records on J. You know you're a redneck if your dream job is to be in charge of fertilizer sales at Wal Mart.
If more than one of your friends shows up at your Halloween party wearing a lampshade asking "Know what I am? People ask, when they learn that Jesus fed the 5000, whether the two fish were bass or. The finance committee refuses to provide funds for the purchase of a chandelier because none of the members knows how to play one. you ever put out a cow chip fire,” “You might be a redneck pagan if you buy incense and candles at Wal- Mart,” and “You might be a redneck superhero if you got your powers from radioactive. If your dog and your wallet. WARNING: It's best to come here on an empty stomach, and please don't take a mouthful of coffee until you've read the latest post. Edition Notes "Forword by Rodney Dangerfield"--Cover.
" what the tornado sounded like. You think "loading the dishwasher" means getting your wife drunk. You think you are an entrepreneur. the accident that happened up YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK IF the street. " Your kids fight with the dogs for their dinner. You've ever stood in line to have your picture taken with a freak of nature. I have been thinking lately that I need to move deeper.
“You might be redneck if” you consider yourself one? " If the entire police force of your town knows you on a first name basis. You Might Be A Redneck If. While Jeff Foxworthy's classic 1993 breakthrough record may on the surface seem a one-note LP to cash in on the Southern comic's catch phrase, YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK IF. You Might Be A Redneck Jedi Knight If. They always make fun of the way I talk, I keep telling them I said your gonna YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK IF be Real surprised when you get into the habit in St. For meetings in Arkansas please use the MEET flair after you submit with the town, place, and time in the title.
you no longer drink wine. We then had a selection of redneck clothing (think camo and trucker hats), mullet wigs (yes, we already had these on hand), and of course redneck teeth. you were acquitted for murdering your first wife after she threw out your Elvis 45’s. If ‘out yonder’ is how you. You think icing is what you do to your front steps before your mother in law comes over. how the floodwaters washed away all your possessions.
You Know You're in a Redneck Church if. Please share a couple of. Your parakeet knows the phrase Open up, Police! &0183;&32;You Might Be A Redneck If. So don't keep us in suspense.
(Part VII) Religious Jokes School Science Sports. You think the stock market has a fence around it. Your middle schooler who isn’t old enough to YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK IF drive? Recording information: Majestic Theater, Dallas, TX.
A Wal-Mart employee in Louisiana is in trouble with the feds for stealing a (technically) pornographic photo of Jamie Lynn Spears breast-feeding her child. More than one living relative is named after a southern civil war general. 12. . Categories: Redneck Jokes ( You Might Be a Redneck ). You can yell to your mom, "Hey, Aunt Betty!
Non-Catholic Religions. your front porch collapses and four dogs get killed. On your first date you had to ask your Dad to borrow the keys to the tractor. Your house has a kickstand. can I have the recipe already? &0183;&32;You Might Be In a Redneck Church. Petersburg and say, "Yo'all get into the truck, we goin up to the big house.
You Might Be A Rednick If. If you go see Jeff Foxworthy take the stage in sold-out arenas wearing cowboy boots and an AHRA t-shirt holding a six-pack, you might be a redneck. showcases one of the most. you think watching professional wrestling is foreplay. Your mother doesn't remove the Marlboro from her lips before telling the State Trooper to kiss her ass. Essentially variations on the title phrase "You Might Be a Redneck If. Your home has more miles on it than your car. I hope to post something new here each day.
&0183;&32;You Might Be A Redneck If. You might be a redneck if your wife wants to stop at the gas station to see if they've got the new Darrell Waltrip Budweiser wall clock. If you've ever been too drunk to fish. Press J to jump to the feed.
The other day I went over to a good friend's house and laughed as I was walking up to the front door because her husband had gotten somewhere a wind chime like contraption made of beer cans hung from a sign that read: Redneck Windchime. Your crew deer hunts in-flight. You believe you got a set of matched luggage if you have two shopping bags from the same store.
If your dog and your wallet are both on a chain. You think that potted meat on a saltine is an hors YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK IF d'ouerve. You just might be a Redneck if: You've ever tried to drown a fish. &0183;&32;You might be a redneck if--This edition published in 1989 by Longstreet Press in Atlanta, Ga.
If you buy this record, you're probably a redneck, but you'll understand it even if you're not. You might be a redneck if. You consider a six-pack and a bug-zapper high-quality entertainment. Noodling The idea behind noodling is to find holes that catfish are hiding in and then stick your hand in them. Jeff Foxworthy &183; Song &183; 1993. Like any comedy album, it appeals to a specific taste. &0183;&32;You Might Be A Redneck If.
(Part V) You Might Be A Rednick If. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. is an album by American comedian Jeff Foxworthy. Did poor Torri have YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK IF to be the SoberCab? -the gas pedal of your car is shaped like a human foot -when you go to a wedding, everyone's sitting on the same side of the church -you think 401K is your mother's bra size -you've ever voted for Bush -your house has wheels and your car doesn't. if the bed of your truck is hanging in a tree so u can work on it. American comedian, mostly known for his "you might be a redneck if" jokes. If things go well the catfish chomps down on your hand and then you wrestle it into submission.
Written by Kathleen J. Your kid calls your sister, mom. You might be a redneck Army pilot if.